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Monday, May 19, 2008

Some comments...

Mi-17/Mi-8MTB

First of all, the Mi-17 continues to amaze me... no make that astound me! I was in an LZ in downtown Kabul today. We landed and were on the ground for a few hours. During the time that we were on the ground a very significant wind came up. A god damn tail wind of course. This was a pretty tight LZ... no room to turn around. Obstacles all sides. "So, What's your plan for getting out of here?" I ask my counterpart...

"I take off... you land! Heh heh heh..." is the reply.

Hmm... my point is not coming across... I try again... "Which way you take off? Direction take off?" (hand movements indicating take off) I ask again in my best cave man english.

"This way of course, I take off..." is the answer. He is pointing directly out with the tail wind.

The flight engineer and i double checked some numbers. We did have plenty of power, OGE +... and it would be a quick peddle turn to get us back into the wind if things got bad... So I figured lets see how this feels. (I was expecting the wind to drop our lift, scare the shit out of this guy, then we could have a practical discussion of tail wind take offs. Well son-of-a-bitch! We came up over the obstacles, got hit with the full 20+knots of wind right up the tail... and what happened. Abso-fuckin'-lutly nothing. We just kept climbing and climbing. I didn't even feel the wind hit us. I looked at what serves as the torque indicator and it wasn't even off the peg! This is at 6000 feet elevation and 34 Deg C going strait up with a 20+ knot tail wind. The russians can sure build a helicopter!

.....................Brake Brake.....................

Marriage?

In my previous post I made the comment that I am not totally opposed to marriage, or something along those lines. What makes me make that sort of statement is some of the people I meet around here. I was ...in this place, doing this thing... and I met a few other Americans. I started talking to one of them and asked, "How long have you been here?" I was expecting an answer somewhere between 2 and 18 months. What he answered was Jan of 05. Holy shit man! What the fuck would make you want to stay here voluntarily for more than three straight years! My only conclusion was that he must have absolutely nothing to go home for... nobody that he cares if he sees somewhere else... Nothing. I meet a lot of these cats, but I sure don't envy them. I know they are probably piling up insane amounts of money somewhere... but why? I am not opposed to the odd 6 months in Colombia or Africa every once in a while, and I can see how one gets sucked into this lifestyle. But there are a lot of dudes out there with no one to write home to. I guess what I was saying is that I am not sure I want to be a 45 year old bachelor with no ties to a home anywhere... even if it does involve flying unmarked helicopters low over trackless dessert and two week R & R's to Tieland every three months!


.....................Brake Brake.....................

Speaking of bachelors. Effectively, there are no women here. I know they are in their homes and neiborhoods, and logically there has to be females here, but not in anyway that interacts with me. For all the advantages of a totally MAN oriented society, (I am imagining all the cyber slaps and dirty looks I am getting from all the females that read this) there are several notable disadvantages. The biggest has to be that the entire society has the "single male" standards for bathroom cleanliness. Now being a single male, I know that I have had some grungy bathrooms. But at least in America, every once in a while you know there will be girls around and you should clean your bathroom... at least a little bit... or at least spray some lysol and wave a sponge at the toilet...

(yes girls, you saw my bathroom in its clean stage... sorry but it could be worse.)

Anyways, now imagine all the bathrooms in your country are never going to be inspected by a girl and were never inspected by a girl... ever... for the last 500 years...

"Wha-oh!" (Yes.. that is a hyphenated compound sound effect. It pretty much says it all.)

.....................Brake Brake.....................

Lunch today.

Sorry for this subject order, but I liked the last transition, what can I do? When I eat lunch at the base, the food is European cafeteria type food. When I am out... it is Afghan food. The Afghan food is usually better. Today was one of those days!

So for lunch today I had rice, some greenish vegetables, a banana, and goat yogurt. I know what you are all thinking... I was a little wierded out by it too... where the hell did these guys get bananas from!?!?!?!

I have no idea.

6 comments:

amateur.sophist said...

You seem to have a lot of free time on your hands. Your posting/commenting schedule has exploded.

Perhaps you should begin work on your first/final masterpiece.

I'm not sure what that would be but it should contain illustrations of complex ideas.

Allison said...

I love it!

Keep up the posts : )

Notorious said...

Well, my increase in posting has several causes. First, there is all sorts if insane shit that is going on over here that I want to tell people about... unfortunately most of it I self censor for security reasons. I also haven't posted pictures for the same reason. I still have the desire to talk to people about it, so I end up just posting anecdotes.

Second... I feel like I ought to write some of this stuff down... you know for posterity and shit. Like a journal, but less likely to end up on a history channel special. What I have found though when I try to write things in a journal is that my voice in the writing pretty much sucks. I read it and it sounds like I am listing events of the day. With posting on here, I am able to imagine my audience much better. I imagine how it would read in the heads of A-S, and Chesto... I imagine what my brother will read from between the lines, I think about how big of an asshole former girlfriends will think I am depending on what I say. I even consider some of the lovely female stalkers that read but never comment as part of my intended audience. (I don't worry to much about the random internet reader or his sensibilities.) Anyways... what I am getting at is I like my own writing much better when I feel like I am writing for an audience. It is easier to go for a joke when there is some remote possibility that someone will laugh at it.

And last, but probably not least... I live in a cargo container. Outside the cargo container there are assholes, Lt Colonels, and dust. Inside the cargo container... well, imagine the inside of cargo container with two beds and a desk. That's it. One sharp cookie hooked up a wireless internet router somewhere near here. (I think it is in the containers on tier up.) So, I spend what free time I have dropping knowledge on you cats.

Notorious said...

Well, my increase in posting has several causes. First, there is all sorts if insane shit that is going on over here that I want to tell people about... unfortunately most of it I self censor for security reasons. I also haven't posted pictures for the same reason. I still have the desire to talk to people about it, so I end up just posting anecdotes.

Second... I feel like I ought to write some of this stuff down... you know for posterity and shit. Like a journal, but less likely to end up on a history channel special. What I have found though when I try to write things in a journal is that my voice in the writing pretty much sucks. I read it and it sounds like I am listing events of the day. With posting on here, I am able to imagine my audience much better. I imagine how it would read in the heads of A-S, and Chesto... I imagine what my brother will read from between the lines, I think about how big of an asshole former girlfriends will think I am depending on what I say. I even consider some of the lovely female stalkers that read but never comment as part of my intended audience. (I don't worry to much about the random internet reader or his sensibilities.) Anyways... what I am getting at is I like my own writing much better when I feel like I am writing for an audience. It is easier to go for a joke when there is some remote possibility that someone will laugh at it.

And last, but probably not least... I live in a cargo container. Outside the cargo container there are assholes, Lt Colonels, and dust. Inside the cargo container... well, imagine the inside of cargo container with two beds and a desk. That's it. One sharp cookie hooked up a wireless internet router somewhere near here. (I think it is in the containers on tier up.) So, I spend what free time I have dropping knowledge on you cats.

Brohiem said...

Well imagine a bathroom that two super bachelors live in. The one roommate that actually thinks women other than your mother deserve some respect has a clean, femme smelling bathroom. Ours is a spectacular train wreck. We have crushed beer cans all over the place to include in the tub, the porn stack is getting ever higher and more respectable with the likes of club, cherri, lollipops, and girls over 40 (its a strange fetish i know, speaking of which i met a 44 YO piece of ass that wants to take me to a swinger club) we do have an impressive collection of political philosophy works such as aquinas and machiavelli there too. as for eating with the locals, i recommend it, fresh food beats canned even in the 3rd world. I did the same in an iraqi city when i was living in sexy baiji. what a shithole that was. The best day was when we got to lay waste to it and every fucker came out to play. as for the containers, mine was double layered with sandbags and sadly was my longest home since graduating high school. Actually I do have some questions as to how yall operate, but ill wait and i know sure as shit mom doesnt want to know. your almost rekindling my desire to go special feces. But i also like being the baddest mother in town with enough force to level a few city blocks even before we call in air strikes (true story) but with that i have added my own touch to yet another fine installment of my brothers wacky adventures among the mongoloids. (its not an act i really do hate and despise those people) and luckly i will soon return to the land where people if they do wipe do so with their hand after going in the street. stay safe, shoot first ask questions later, and when in doubt dump a mag.

Chestocrates said...

fucking brilliant.

keep up the good work, gentlemen.

Anyone up for some commercial air over to kabul?

(somewhere around 2800US)

I wouldn't need a place to stay, since I don't plan on sleeping.