Monday, August 21, 2006

The UN needs more beer!

Training is complete... I am now an "Instructor Pilot, Helicopter, UH-1N" This new designation now makes me elegible for some supper pimp assignments in Florida near Pensacola when I am done here in MT... as well as puts me on the short list for another trip to the desert.

My observations are that US foriegn relations should focus more on beer and food... apparently spicy food. In the dorm that I was living in down in Albuquerque (that is spelled right) there was only one communal kitchen. What ended up developing was that quite a few of us would end up making food for each other and eating together.

This is the night I left...Everyone tried to bring thier spicyest food. Though it wasn't a competition, people noted who had the most painful food to eat. The Europeans and Arabs had nothing for spice. There was quite a close competition between the Indians and Pakastanis but the Tai's kicked total ass... though I don't know about the medium of boiled chicken as a delivery method for spice. This was the only time in my life that I will be considered a culinary genious for melting some cheddar cheeze on some nachos and througing on some hot sause. This really impressed the Tais who wanted to know where they could get "Franks Hot Sause." I told them the condiments section of gas stations... which is actually where I got mine.

This whole excersice even had the romanian fighter pilot drinking water... which he had clamed he had never drank before in his life!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Arabs... zen masters and total playa's, who knew?

So I was sitting around my dorm talking to some of the exchange officers. We ended up talking about mideast politics. My arab friend was absolutly possitive that the late King Hussain of Jordan could have solved everything.

N=Notorious, Y=My buddy who will not be named here.

Y- "the leader of the country should always be passed from father to son... and father to son again... it is the best government."

N- "Why, what are the advantages of that?"

Y- "Then the leader will have the loyalties of the whole country. The king will make the best desision for the whole of the country always."

N- "What happens if a father is a wise leader... but he has a son who is an idiot."

Y- "This is no problem... he will have many wise men around to advise him..."

N- "You don't think a democracy or republic would be better so that everyone gets a hand in who would be the best leader? That way the people could choose the best and wisest leader."

Y- "Well... no, it is a horrable idea. Half the country will not have wanted to have this man the leader... and they won't be loyal. To have a loyal country, don't give them a choice."

N- "What about the possibility of a son who is so complete an idiot so that he won't listen to his advisors?"

Y- "What about the possibility that the people voting for their leader are idiots..."

Tue-shay dude, Tue-shay.

Now the same man on girls...

Y- "Are you married?"

N- "No... (followed by a quick run down of my current situation)"

Y- "We don't have these problems. We would never have a girlfriend."

N- "Interesting, not a bad idea... so how do you meet girls?"

Y- "Coffee shops, class, or if you can not find a girl that way... you can always ask your mother or sisters or aunts to find you one, but it must be a woman who finds you a girl."

N- "Why a woman who finds her for you?"

Y- "It is the best way. You can never know the girl's mind like another girl."

N- "What if you don't like her after you have already been married?"

Y- "Well I think that you should like her. ---- But you can always get divorced."

N- "Is there a lot of divorce?"

Y- "No, almost never. It is better to take another wife."

N- "If you are already having women problems, why would you want another one around... doesn't that make it worse?"

Y- "Ha Ha ha... No my friend, a man with more than one wife will always have the sweetest most attentive wives. A man with one wife must work for her attention, a man with two wives, the wives work for his attention!" (This comment was followed by a wink and hearty laught.)

"A man with two wifes is free... and if he gives them children... he is completely his own man, all he must do is have the roof fixed and pay for food."

I have been over it in my head... I think that is some genious shit... Oh well, off to study my Qaran.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Flying again!

I had my first flight in an actual aircraft yesterday in about a month. A minorish in-flight emergency terminated the flight. At a fairly thrust and power critical moment the #1 engine didn't want to play anymore and desided to just chill out. Luckily we were fairly light weight so we didn't hit the ground... I just flew out of it and brought it gently to the ground. Like a typical machine, when we showed the maintainance dudes... it wouldn't do it again, but the scary part was that the mechanics didn't seem very surprised. They went right to the problem part and said..."yea, we replaced the fuel control unit yesterday... guess there are a few bugs in it yet." WTF?

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Rain and Naivity

I saw the CV-22 fly for the first time a few days ago. That is an ungangly beast! See the bottom aircraft. I have flown the simulator for it. To be honest I was hoping for something inspiring and graceful, but it turn out it is just really cool.

In other more green news. It has rained here for the last 6 days strait. I had never seen it rain here before at all... now I can practially watch the plants grow. What was dirt a week ago is now almost golf course green. I really like rain!

On doomsday predictions... hmm... it turns out that 2012 looks like a good number doesn't it.

As naive as it may sound, I think if people took the time to get to know each other, we would all get along. There are a bunch of exchange pilots here in my dorm. They come from all over to learn the secrets of effective and safe aviation. Apart from always making wierd smelling food, they are pretty cool guys. Everybody sits around smoking and telling stories about shitty co-pilots that almost killed them, thier own mistakes and how to ovoid them, how dumb regulations are, and chasing women. (Even the guys from Jordan, Morocco, Pakistan, and others that one wouldn't expect here,) Person to person, we all seem to like each other. If on the smallest level we seem to get along, how the hell do we end up in mortal combat against each other?